Valentine's 09, by the numbers

Firearms mailed to Arizona: 1
Candy accepted from strangers: 2.12 oz.
Surly redneck gun nuts asked for eyeshadow: 1
Minutes spent in the shower washing (fake) blood off of skin and clothing: 20
Gin&tonics consumed: Plenty
Fink Bombs consumed: 2
Marriage proposals advanced: 1
Goats promised in dowry: 4
Kisses: 1
New friends: 5 and counting